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    Imagine paradise, now think of the furthest thing from it, and I'm in the place furthest from that.
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    Bonds of Shinobi

    Focus: This is an original that I came up with for the simple fact is that I like to write. This is also my first fan-fiction however this isn't in relation to the main story in anyway other then the universe itself. This story is in the same universe as Naruto but I've written back during the earlier times of Konoha and the Five Great Nations and I've made up characters, used the names of other characters in different settings for the most part and in no way is this going to lead up to a future where the current happenings of the Naruto series are in harmony with this. This is simply a ramble story because I feel like writing something. Everything up until the founding of Konoha and the other Great Nations is still in affect, Sage of 6 Paths, Juubi, two sons, etc. Hashirama and Madara founded Konoha but Madara feels like the Senju have taken control of the village and have made dogs of the Uchiha and he manages to get a small group of Uchiha willing to follow him and strike back against the Hokage and the Senju. Madara takes control of Kyuubi but Hashirama breaks that control and the beast is sealed within one of the protagonists, Shisui Uzumaki. Hashirama and Madara fight and Madara is killed (indefinitely) and Hashirama is critically wounded. Tobirama is much younger and he takes charge while his brother is in a coma. Hashirama wakes up and dies just after appointing his brother as Hokage. There are multiple characters names in the series that will be mentioned however not in the sense you're used to but the main focus is on the hardships of each of the main characters (See below), and the bonds they form and how it changes them throughout a arc of time that ends during the start of the First Great Shinobi World War (GSWWI). I'm going to write a first piece and then I'm going to leave it open to criticisms, suggestions, and I want to know if I should continue with the story or not.
    __________________________________________________ _________
    Prologue: Almost a year has passed since the defeat of traitorous Madara Uchiha. Madara Uchiha, one of the founders of Konoha attempted to assassinate Shodai Hokage, Hashirama Senju and take control of Konoha away from the Senju. Madara along with his followers managed to take control of the Kyuubi and used it's great power to gain the upper hand against Konoha and the Senju, however thanks to the techniques of Hashirama and the Uzumaki clan, the demon was sealed into Shisui Uzumaki. The battle that took place between the shinobi of Konoha and the Uchiha rebels was a short lived one however, the battle between Hashirama and Madara was a battle that will live, not only in the history of Konoha but in the history of the most admirable shinobi bouts in history. It was in that battle, at the Valley of Ends where Hashirama killed Madara and also prevented the destruction of Konoha. It was also in that battle that Hashirama would sustain injuries that would leave him in a comatose state for months only to have him wake up and die a few short minutes afterward, leaving Konoha in the hands of his younger brother Tobirama. The reconstruction of Konoha is still underway and Tobirama, still a young shinobi, now in charge of an entire village makes his stand as a leader. As he makes his stand he faces the consequences of being a leader. All the while the next generation of Konoha shinobi begins to blossom in their spring of youth. Each shinobi undergoing obstacles of their own. Just as a flower is brought to life in the spring and it's roots, stem, and peddles shape how it is looked upon in the world and how its behavior is shaped, the next generation of Konoha shinobi undergo the same process. Their roots, the environment they are born into and their situation of difficulty that they must face. Their stem, as they grow to find their way of the shinobi and their way of life. Their peddles, the final form they reach that shows who they truly are on the inside and out. All of these are formed within this next generations. They are born, and they form bonds with the earth around them, their comrades that will shape their being...will they be beautiful and majestic, or will they wilt and die before they ever reach maturity.
    __________________________________________________ _________
    Tobirama Senju: Nidaime Hokage of Konohagakure. A young shinobi in his mid thirties who must repair Konoha in its darkest days yet. Fearless, strong, wise as a leader yet overwhelmed as a human being. Mourning over the death of those who died protecting the village and more importantly to him, the death of his other brother who represented a father to him after their own passed long before Tobirama's birth. He mourns and goes through the pressure of leading his people who now look upon him for guidance when he still needs guidance himself, and is now all alone with the responsibility he never intended to have.
    Kagami Uchiha: A young new genin fresh out of the new Shinobi Academy establishment of Nidaime Hokage. Disgusted by the actions of the few in his clan that have brought shame to his clan and the peace that they once had, and yet also angry with the Hokage for the mistrust he now shows to those within his clan who were innocent in the actions taken upon by their former leader. The death of his parents, who were part of the coup, and the mixed emotions he has about being a part of the dysfunctional Konoha plague him more then anything.
    Tsubaki Tsuchi: A naive girl who goes who understands little of the world around her, sheltered by a family that faces problems that pale in comparison to those around her. She realizes little and because of her ignorance she hurts herself trying to help those she cares about and also hurts those around her who only wish to help her. Her growth is different from the others around her in the sense that she must learn to understand her comrades before she can truly help herself and them.
    Shisui Uzumaki: The next Jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi demon. A young brand new genin who has a unique and extraordinary chakra. Facing the loss of his parents to the Kyuubi attack on the village a year ago he faces loneliness and no help from his village. Now with the Kyuubi inside him he faces exile, resentment and fear from his people. With no love and no support his feelings of abandonment, fear, anger, are in conflict with his love passed down from his father. “I love my village...It's weird but I don't have a reason why” his true feelings about those who exile him.
    Love: A loyal, man to Konoha who has witnessed many friends killed in the battle against the Uchiha. He's developed mistrust towards the Uchiha like most of the village and has a deep hatred for him. His intense emotion makes him believe that his village is turning its back on him and itself and he goes down and as a result he blinds himself of his intentions.
    Danzo Shiruma: A militant young shinobi who believes that the only way for Konoha to become strong is to assert it's power over the other nations. In order to do so he makes proposals that seem to better for Konoha but violate the rights of others and as a result he sets up an organization to do the dirty work in the shadows of Konoha and he gains the support of Love although their actions morally are frowned down upon by humanity. “A lion does not abide by the laws of another species, so why should a shinobi abide by the laws humans when clearly it is not”
    Chapter 1: Spring's Beginning

    Over a decade ago the truce between Uchiha and Senju was formed and the establishment of Konohagakure was created. In the few years between then and now the Great Nations of Iwagakure, Kirigakure, Kumogakure, and Sunagakure were formed and the Five Great Shinobi Nations, including Konoha now exist as the pillars of the shinobi world created over a century by the Sage of 6 Paths...Only a year the first of the Great Nations, the example set for all the others almost fell by the hands of one of those who helped in its founding. Konoha faces its first hardship as a Shinobi Nation. Not only the village but those who reside in it have been struck as well. Spring time however for some this may be the winter in which their flower dies.

    Mito “Tobirama-sama the Medical Corp. needs more supplies, the medics are spread thin with their resources”

    Tobirama “I already know that Shizune just came by and told me”

    Mito “Also the rationing of weapons is thinning. We're running out of metal to make the basics, the boarder units are having trouble setting up traps.”

    Tobirama “How are the missions coming?”

    Mito “Our completion rate is very high but the fact of the matter is that the other countries just aren't in the market to pay for hiring other shinobi villages. They're either in the motions of setting up their own shinobi establishments or getting deals from the other Great Nations that have good relations with them already. This is still a new system here.”

    Tobirama “I see, what are the highest paying countries that we have under our wing at this point in time?”

    Mito “The Land of Birds is requesting an assassination mission for a shinobi who assassinated a relative of the Daimyou and there are a couple of B listing missions in the Lands of Claw, Moons, and Rivers.”

    Tobirama “Are there any A listings besides the assassination?”

    Mito “No sir~”

    Tobirama “Then find some and charge as much as you can for them. We still need money for contractors, and funding for the new establishments...get a move on it Mito!”

    Mito “I understand (bows and begins to leave)”

    Tobirama “One more thing...how is the Academy doing?”

    Mito “The first batch of graduates have passed the exams. 27 I believe, I don't think we have enough jounin to spread out to teach them one on one and go on missions.”

    Tobirama “Make it happen. I know they've just started but they're going to have their first missions be high level C and B-ranked level. We have to do everything we can to make sure all our affairs are in order before we can set a more relaxed pace.”

    Mito “Understood Nidaime-sama.”

    Mito leaves the room to take care of her business and a moment later the agonizing cries of a baby can be heard from the next room over by Tobirama. The shinobi gets up and heads to the room where the cries emerge from. A large white room, with one large window opens up and a single crib lies within the center of the large room. The Hokage heads to the crib and picks up the baby within it and begins rocking it to sooth her tears.

    Tobirama “I suppose I shouldn't complain. You're the only thing I know how to deal with right now. I can stop whatever is making you cry, but I can't seem to do that with anybody else...Brother why did you leave me with all this? The village...your child...this is all too much.”

    The Hokage tries to sooth his niece and he manages to stop her crying. He doesn't place her back in her crib but instead straps her to the front of him and decides to take her to work with him. He lets loose a sigh and smiles down at the baby. The first smile he's had since his brother's death...The Shinobi Academy of Konoha is not yet a building, simply a large field off to the side of Konoha where the students undergo their training. In the large field 27 shinobi stand, and kneel exhausted. Some even vomit from the intense tests they've went through moments ago.

    Shi “Well done all of you. From this point on you are all genin.”

    The chuunin stands looking over all the children and see's their fatigue. His eye catches two shinobi in particular, Shisui Uzumaki and Kagami Uchiha, both of whom, stand tall and are the least fatigued of the bunch.

    Shi “*Those two...Shisui and Kagami. They're potential knows no bounds. For them to be standing after this without the slightest fatigue...is amazing* Alright everybody go home and get a good nights rest. One week from today you are to report back here for your new assignments as shinobi.”

    The shinobi all nod and those that still maintain energy enough to move, head home. The others simply remain still and rest there until the other proctors aid them. Shisui and Kagami cross paths. Kagami's Sharingan, only half developed (two tome) stares past his new comrade with deep thought and seriousness. Shisui, with his green Jade necklace looks past Kagami with a look of intense pain and depression, however it is subtle...Night falls and Konoha turns silent and peaceful, even in its damaged state. At the Hokage residence the instructor of the Konoha Shinobi Academy enters to discuss the new graduates.

    Shi “Hokage-sama, excuse my interruption but I have the scores and have just finished the profiles of all the new genin graduates”

    Tobirama “The village is so peaceful at night. From this position the moon shines down directly on the village and the river sparkles. It's so majestic”

    Shi “Hokage-sama?”

    Tobirama “What do you have for me Shi-san?”

    The shinobi shows the profiles of the 27 shinobi and just as Shi was interested in them, Tobirama looks at the profiles of Kagami and Shisui.

    Tobirama “These two...they were the top graduates?”

    Shi “Yes sir. Kagami has had his Sharingan active for quite some time now. He may be one of the youngest Uchiha clan members to do so, and Shisui shows great natural physical prowess”

    Tobirama “I want these two to be on the same team”

    Shi “But sir...the curve on the teams will be disrupted with the two best students on the same team”

    Tobirama “I know but given the circumstances this is the best way to do things.”

    Shi “You mean with Kagami's Sharingan and Shisui's~”

    Tobirama “Yes that's exactly what I mean. I'm sorry but at this point in time I'm too busy to oversee these things. I want you to place Shisui Uzumaki and Kagami Uchiha on the same team, I'm going to leave the rest to you and the other chuunin instructors”

    Shi “I suppose I can put the student with the worst scores on their team...Alright I understand you're stressed Hokage-sama. I'll handle the rest of the team listings. I just have one more question, who do you want to teach them?”

    Tobirama “Miyagi-san, I'm more then certain in his abilities”

    Shi “Yes sir”

    The shinobi leaves heads back to the academy. The rest of the instructors sit in the conference room, tired after a long day however not as much as their former students. They deliberate on how the match ups for the teams should be made and which shinobi should teach them. However many feel that Kagami and Shisui should be separated from each other for the sake of balance.

    Shi “Listen everybody the match up for the team of Kagami Uchiha and Shisui Uzumaki is straight from Nidaime himself and I don't intend to disobey him, especially during these hard times. This is what's going to be done so the other teams are just going to have to manage for themselves.

    Instructor 1 “Very well have you decided who else to place on their team?”

    Shi “It only seems right to place Tsubaki Tsuchi on the team with them”

    Instructor 2 “But she'll never be able to keep up with them at their level~”

    Instructor 3 “In the interest of balance that seems like the only logical option”

    Shi “Enough. I placed her on that team because her assets that are strong cover both Kagami and Shisui in their weaker areas. She's a sensor and she has a great talent for genjutsu. She'll fair on that team”

    Instructor 3 “Is everybody straight on the other team parings?”

    The instructors nod and after a long day they leave. Shi passes by the riverside on his way home and he sees Shisui staring into the sky at the docks. The shinobi heads down to the young genin to speak with him.

    Shisui “Sensei it's a beautiful night isn't it”

    Shi “You shouldn't be out so late you should rest up as best you can. Your journey as a shinobi only gets tougher from here on”

    Shisui “I know...but I do this to keep the peace inside of me...the sky, the moon, the river...they distract me from everything else”

    Shi “Shisui...let me ask you a question...what is your reason for wanting to be a shinobi?”

    Shisui “To be honest sensei I don't want to be a shinobi...however I feel I have to now that I have the responsibility of protecting Konoha from this demon inside of me. I don't want to be but...I don't really mind it”

    Shi “I see *I can only imagine the pain this boy's going through...* Don't stay out too late.

    Shisui “I won't good night sensei”

    The teacher leaves his student in his thoughts. Shisui looked at peace despite his obvious pain. As Shi heads home he sees Kagami sitting up on top of a tree looking at the sky. He turns his head and looks back down to where Shisui sits. Both have been through serious pain and both seem to have similar solutions at this point in time. They look to earth and heavens to dispel their pain but soon, they enter the world of the shinobi, and their solutions now will soon be left behind. When they enter the world of the shinobi they will be forced to discover new ways to work out their pain.
    One Week Passes
    The shinobi graduates of the Academy return to their former establishment of teaching and prepare for their new assignments as shinobi.

    Shi “Now that everybody is here we can start the proceedings. You've all done well on these exams but this is nothing to the world you now face as shinobi of Konoha. You are the lowest of the low right now, genin. However in time you may rise from this low level and become strong, admirable shinobi. You will now be placed on squads of three under the guidance of an elite jounin. Under them you will be taught further in the shinobi arts then in the academy, note that this training will be far more strenuous then here but it will all be rewarding if you manage to complete it. Now lets begin...Team 1, Kagami Uchiha, Shisui Uzumaki, and Tsubaki Tsuchi.

    The three genin look at each other and with Tsubaki's sensory abilities she looks into the inner beings of her new teammates. Within Kagami she sees great confusion and reluctance along with an amazing inner power. With Shisui she sees, intense darkness and true malevolence however in his core she sees a pureness that she doesn't understand. The combination confuses her but the darkness of the Kyuubi she see's within creates great fear in her...Shi reads off the other names of the paired shinobi and then introduces them to their new instructors.

    Miyagi “Team 1, I am Miyagi Kotetsu. I will be training you from this point onwards in the shinobi arts. Before we get started I want you to introduce yourselves to me and I want to know what your goals are as shinobi...lets start with you young lady”

    Tsubaki “I am Tsubaki Tsuchi. My goal for becoming a kunoichi is so I can be strong and protect my village”

    Miyagi “Yes that is very admirable...now how about you young man (points to Kagami)

    Kagami “I'm Kagami Uchiha, and I only want people to recognize me as what a true respectable Uchiha is supposed to be seen as, strong”

    Miyagi “I see...and how about you (points to Shisui)

    Shisui “I'm Shisui Uzumaki and I want to protect Konoha”

    Miyagi “Well it looks like you all have a very clear head as to what you want to do with your lives. I will do my best to mentor you and to make those dreams of yours a reality”

    The polite man smiles at his new students and tries to reassure them that he can help them...Later in the day, after the students have left their sensei for the day Miyagi heads to the Hokage residence to speak with Tobirama.

    Tobirama “So Miyagi...how are they fairing? Are they to your liking”

    Miyagi “Tobirama-dono I sense a great deal of conflict within all of them. This team is highly unstable as a unit. I sense a lot of pain within in Shisui, confusion in Kagami, and a very high unawareness within Tsubaki”

    Tobirama “I know...I want you to train them because I know that if anybody can help them it's you.”

    Miyagi “Kagami and Shisui...they also have extraordinary powers. The damage that's been done to them already makes them naturally fragile to shape in the ways that we hope. This is a very difficult situation you've put me in Tobirama-dono”

    Tobirama “I know...but there isn't anybody else who has a chance of correcting it”

    Miyagi “I understand. I will deal with them to the best of my abilities”

    The shinobi leaves the presence of the Hokage and his look has completely changed from the gentle, and nurturing one that he showed his students earlier...The journey of the young genin begin...
    Late Night
    In the forests of the Land of Waterfalls 8 Takigakure shinobi are in pursuit of a lone shinobi, who has managed to steel documents containing information of a powerful forbidden technique developed by the leader of their village. The lone shinobi, dressed in all black, from head to toe runs at a great speed from his pursuers. In a sudden moment the shinobi slows down and comes to a stop. Four shinobi jump down from the trees above in front of him and the other four enter from his rear.

    Taki 1 “Have you decided to give up?”

    ??? “No, I'm just exactly where I need to be”

    Taki 2 “Enough! Return the documents you stole and turn yourself in”

    ??? “1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8...This shouldn't take long if I use it”

    Taki 2 “Quit Stalling!”

    The shinobi makes four hand seals.

    ??? “Ninpo: Youkai Ryoushi no Jutsu (Ninja Art: Phantom Hunter Jutsu)

    Suddenly two of the shinobi in front of him fall to their knees in deep pain holding their heads.

    Taki 1 “Hey what's wrong? What happened”

    The two shinobi stand up as if they were possessed and lash out at their comrade and kill him

    Taki 3 “What the hell?”

    The two shinobi lash out again at their other comrade but he gets out of the way and leaps in a tree. The other shinobi throw multiple kunai and shuriken at the shinobi and they hit spot on and he falls to the ground. They go over to him and they turn his body over to see one of their comrades that turned on them. They look and see that the shinobi is safe next to the other.

    Taki 4 “What the hell?!”

    The other possessed falls down to the ground and unknowingly with great speed the shinobi gets behind two of the Taki shinobi and cuts them down with his blade.

    ??? “Four more”

    He begins to vanish as if he were a ghost and the four remaining shinobi get together looking in all directions trying to spot him. Three of the shinobi are taken out one by one in a rapid pace by kunai to the head, leaving only one left. The shinobi appears behind the last Taki-nin and places his blade to his neck.

    ??? “I'll give you a chance to simply return back to your village and report your mission failed. There's no reason you have to die like your friends. Just leave me to my business.”

    Taki 5 “You bastard! I'll die before I let you get away with this”

    ??? “Your words not mine”

    The shinobi slits the neck of the last shinobi but the shinobi uses the substitution jutsu and a log appears in his place. The Taki-nin stabs his enemy in the back from behind.

    Taki 5 “You underestimate my power~”

    The Taki shinobi suddenly coughs and his chest begins to bleed he looks surprised. The shinobi looks behind at the Taki-nin and touches his forehead. The Taki shinobi looks down again and sees that his hand and kunai have pierced him and he looks at the shinobi dressed in black standing across from him.

    ??? “All you had to to was leave but instead you kill yourself”

    The last Takigakure shinobi falls and the shinobi leaves the scene and heads to a bridge leaving the land. He meets up with a masked shinobi at the end of the bridge.

    ??? “Danzo-san I apologize for being late”

    Danzo “That's alright...I assume that you didn't leave any alive to realize your identity Love?”

    Love “No, they weren't much of a challenge but still”

    Danzo “The documents?”

    Love “Stay with me until we reach the village Danzo”

    Danzo “Very well. Tell me at least what you managed to learn before you had to leave”

    Love “The technique allows the user to live much longer through the obtaining of hearts from different people. Basically the user can hold up to four hearts and replace one after another as it gets to old. It's sort of like an immortality jutsu however there is something else that I'm not so sure about. I couldn't decipher much else before I was detected”

    Danzo “This is very useful. We'll review it with my researchers back at the village but for now we better leave. I assume if those men chasing you don't return soon they're going to send more after us”

    The shinobi nods and Love puts on his Konoha headband, as does Danzo and they head back to Konoha with the stolen documents....

    Now I know that there wasn't a lot of action in this chapter, this was just an opening mainly. Also the technique I made up I just used one of the Japanese online dictionaries so I don't know how accurate it is. I just felt like putting something new in there. Like, dislike, discuss, criticize, suggest things, I'll listen for five minutes and go get something to eat.

    Following
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=84747-Bonds of Shinobi II
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=85557-Bonds of Shinobi III
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=89100-Bonds of Shinobi IV
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=89142- Bonds of Shinobi V
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=90365- Bonds of Shinobi VI
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=91168- Bonds of Shinobi VII
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=92360- Bonds of Shinobi VIII
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=93293- Bonds of Shinobi IX
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=94088- Bonds of Shinobi X
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=95450- Bonds of Shinobi XI
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=97049- Bonds of Shinobi XII
    http://www.narutobase.net/forums/showthread.php?t=98256- Bonds of Shinobi XIII
     
         
    Last edited by Reborn; 09-06-2011 at 02:23 AM.

  2. #2
    Reborn's Avatar
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    Please any suggestions, critisisms, how did I do for a first chapter? yes no, maybe so?
     
         

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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    I liked it very much.
    Good work and I hope to see more.

    Loved the metaphor in the prologue :D
    I can see this going pretty well if you decide to continue.
    All the best.
     
         

  4. #4
    Member naruto kyuubi's Avatar
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    i liked ur chapter it was really good
     
         

  5. #5
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    nice
     
         

  6. #6
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    I also liked the flower metaphor...
    I think it's good, and to me, there was enough action for a first chapter. 0.o
    Question: Is 'dono' the same as 'sama'? I've heard it before, but unsure of how it's used...
    The only thing that bothered me, was when Love did the jutsu, and it was described that the two shinobi felt pain, I had imagined the pain was immense, so that they couldn't even talk, so when Taki-1 asked, "Hey, what's wrong?" I felt that was a bit off...
    but that's just me... >___> "
    Anyways, I think it's a good first chapter.
     
         

  7. #7
    Reborn's Avatar
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    Thanks for the feed back peoples. I just posted my second chapter up and it's a little longer then this one. So give it a shot when ya got time.
     
         

  8. #8
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    yeah
     
         

  9. #9
    is carbon based. Ira's Avatar
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    I see that script format is mosr common at NB. .. The story looks interesting; If I may suggest something..

    Make your paragraphs a little shorter. devide them into two when possible. There is nothing wrong with your format at the moment as it is- it's just that unlike a book it is a bit difficult to concentrate on big chunks of text on computer screens.

    So relatively shorter paragraphs and a little more space between two paragraphs makes it a bit more easy read.- JUst IMO.
     
         

  10. #10
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    Where to start-congratulations on creating your first fanfiction. I see this a lot; beginners using a manga and or anime mainly Naruto as a base for their story as did I lol However, I loved the way you choose to go about it with Senju Tobirama. It is an intriguing plot thus far and I love how you incorporated Uchiha Kagami/the original character Uzumaki Shisui :) I really like Kishi’s depiction for Kagami and with the fact that his character is involved is phenomenal. Kagami, Shisiu and Tsubaki mirror Sasuke, Naruto and Sakura in different aspects which I think is awesome and very Kishi like ^.^ Don’t know if that was what you were intending but it is my interpretation with the characters out of your story. I was also able to feel the sufferings, etc. that Kagami/Shisui have gone through; especially Kagami. It was long but well worth the read. So you are far along as am I thus I have a ways to go to be up to date but I’m looking forward to the following releases! Great job ;)
     
         

  11. #11
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    really nice i liked it
     
         
    Last edited by serenaandrosie; 10-01-2011 at 03:17 PM.

  12. #12
    Yin–Yang Release
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    wow, this is great.
     
         

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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    Quote Originally Posted by Sharingan Shinobi View Post
    wow, this is great.
    Wow, this chapter brings back memories, thanks for liking it.
     
         

  14. #14
    Rockstar From Mars. mcchikeneater's Avatar
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    first fanfic ive ever read, pretty cool.
     
         

  15. #15
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    Quote Originally Posted by mcchikeneater View Post
    first fanfic ive ever read, pretty cool.
    First fanfic I've ever done, this was a while ago though.
     
         

  16. #16
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    This is great Reborn ^_^
    I like the fact that you based the story off Naruto and incorporated Tobirama and Shisui. Overall I found this fantastic and loved it
    Im off to read the rest ^^

    Also I agree with what Tsushi said, the paragraphs are a little long but I dont really mind But shorter would be nice
     
         

  17. #17
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    Re: Bonds of Shinobi

    excellent reborn
     
         

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